Let's Do This Thang!!

What's that? Make pie? Pumpkin bread, perhaps? All while doing some yoga? Nope.  I started this...

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Today I started Jillian Michaels' 30 Day Shred. 
I vow to do this every day, for the next 30 days.  I officially start my half-marathon training program on Monday, April 18th. Oh Hal Higdon, how I fear you.  I failed you last time and I will not fail you again.

So my training for that will overlap with finishing the Shred.  But that's ok. And I will continue going to yoga classes, too. Let's hope all this gets me into prime shape, baby!

So why the pumpkin?
I couldn't find my hand weights. Whoops. So for today, I had 1lb weights. By tomorrow I will find my cute pink 2lb hand weights and will use those, instead.

Day 1.
She breaks it into 3 levels, allowing you to take it to the next level when you're ready. So I started with level 1.
I won't lie. It was hard. Mainly because I am out of shape. But I powered through.  Actually, the hardest part was the damn pushups. I loathe pushups. They are my enemy.  I hate how they hide out in yoga, disguising themselves with a fancy name {Chaturanga}. Grrr.
But the best part about her workout? No pausing. Just power through for 20 intense minutes.
Me - the lack-of-attention-span-queen.  I can do anything for 20 minutes.  I love that I did not look at the clock, thinking, "crap. 45 more minutes left."
And it made me sweat. Quickly.

So let's see how effective this workout is, shall we?
Here are official stats, taken today w/ my trusty 10 year old bathroom scale and my sewing measuring tape.

Height:  5' 5""
Weight:  115lb
BMI:  19.13
Waist:  27"
Hips:  34.5"
Thighs:  21"
Chest:  33"
Bicep:  10"

I am laughing my booty off right now.  I used this body fat calculator.  It tells me that I have 33% body fat, which is obese (where's that 'hysterically laughing' emoticon?)

Yes, I know that my body fat is higher than it should be and I need more lean muscle mass. But OBESE? Come on. I wear a size 0 or 2. Do they need to use *that* word?  I think I'll stay away from that calculator.

So that's it.  I will do the same measurements again in 30 days :)

Pity.

Rolling in some self-pity here. And I need to get my ass up out of it and do something about it. Yeah - I got some nice comments about me not needing spanx and being able to wear leggings and whatnot. But here's the thing: I am skinny fat. And I seriously do not feel good about myself right now and need to stop feeling bad and start feeling good. I came across these photos last week while looking for a specific photo:

 

 San Antonio '05

Austin '05

 {i look kinda weird b/c i am leaning back}

Austin '07

Those capris don't fit right now. Sigh.

That was fall 2005, people. 2005. That was 2 years after having TWINS and 3.5 years after having my first baby.  I thought that perhaps I was blessed with good genes. I was on the move all the time, but not exercising excessively and just eating normally.  And crap, when I started running, I had to eat more because I was losing too much weight.

And now? I wallow in self pity. Because now I am skinny fat.  I would not expose my tummy. My tummy dun-lop over my jeans without those spanx (is that called muffin top?)  No abs. Sigh.

What happened? I got sick last winter/spring. Bronchitis. Then pneumonia. Then epstein-barr.  I stopped working out with that string of illness. And then I don't know. I just don't know.  Did the Lexapro make me gain? Was the Wellbutrin helping keeping it off? What I do know is that I know I have to be healthy and do something about it. Because if I allow myself to wallow in pity, I will do something stupid and fall back into former bad habits. Because if you've ever had a bad habit, you know that bad habits die hard.

For over 10 years I had an eating disorder. And the diaticians, the psycologists...they all told me what I needed to hear. That I would slowly kill myself if I didn't knock it off. But did that stop me? Nope. Because it took me, making up my mind, that enough was enough and I would do it.

And you know what? Those desires to just fall back into those habits. To have control over that part of my life again? Its so easy just to do it. But I won't. I won't take the easy way out.  I am getting my ass up and am going to get that body back, hot damn!